Εφηβεία: Οι αρνητικοί τύποι “φίλων” και πώς θα τους διαχειριστούν τα παιδιά

THE MAMAGERS TEAM20 ΑΥΓΟΥΣΤΟΥ, 2024

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Τα παιδιά στην εφηβεία– και νωρίτερα- θα γνωρίζουν στο σχολείο, στις δραστηριότητες, στις βόλτες πολλά διαφορετικά παιδιά. Κάποια θα γίνουν πραγματικοί φίλοι, θα τους σέβονται, θα τους βοηθούν, θα πιστεύουν σε αυτά και θα είναι δίπλα τους για πάντα. Κάποια άλλα, όμως, μπορεί να τα πληγώσουν, μπορεί να τα ξεγελάσουν, μπορεί να τα στεναχωρήσουν. Εμείς ως γονείς δεν μπορούμε να επηρεάσουμε το πώς θα φέρονται οι άλλοι στα παιδιά μας, όμως μπορούμε να τους μάθουμε ποιος τύπους ανθρώπους να αποφεύγουν αλλά και πώς να συμπεριφέρονται όταν τους συναντήσουν στη ζωή τους.

Ο “φίλος” που κουτσομπολεύει

Μιλάει συνέχεια για τους άλλους, για το τι κάνουν, σχολιάζουν αρνητικά και σίγουρα δεν μπορούν να κρατήσουν ένα μυστικό. Είναι πολύ πιθανό να “κουτσομπολεύουν” κι εσένα πίσω από την πλάτη σου.

Πώς να τον αντιμετωπίσεις: Να αλλάζεις τη συζήτηση κάθε φορά που κουτσομπολεύουν και να μην μοιράζεσαι τα μυστικά σου μαζί τους.
Ο “φίλος” που κριτικάρει

Ψάχνει πάντα τα λάθη των άλλων και νιώθεις συνέχεια ότι υποτιμούν ό,τι και να κάνεις.


Πώς να τον αντιμετωπίσεις: Να θυμάσαι ότι μάλλον έχουν χαμηλή αυτοεκτίμηση, να θυμάσαι ότι μια κριτική είναι η γνώμη κάποιου όχι απαραίτητα η αλήθεια. Να τους αγνοήσεις εντελώς αν δεν τους θέλεις για φίλους ή να τους δείξεις καλοσύνη αν τους αγαπάς.

Αυτός που θέλει να τα έχει με όλους καλά

Συνήθως πληγώνονται γιατί προσπαθούν πάντα να μην στεναχωρήσουν τους άλλους, δεν έχουν άποψη και οι άλλοι τους εκμεταλλεύονται.

Πώς να τον αντιμετωπίσεις: Ζήτα του την άποψή του για κάτι, ρώτα τον πώς νιώθει πραγματικά, δώσε του βοήθεια.
Αυτός που “είναι καλύτερος” σε όλα

Υπάρχουν φίλοι που δεν αντέχουν τη σύγκριση. Θέλουν να είναι καλύτεροι σε όλα. Για καθετί που λες, έχουν να πουν κάτι καλύτερο που έκαναν.

Πώς να τον αντιμετωπίσεις: Μην παίρνεις προσωπικά όσα λένε. Μην περιμένεις να δείξουν κατανόηση σε αυτά που μοιράζεσαι ή να σε βοηθήσουν σε κάτι. Να είσαι ευγενικός, αλλά κράτα τις σοβαρές συζητήσεις για τους άλλους φίλους σου.
Αυτός που εκφοβίζει τους άλλους

Μπορεί αν μην εκφοβίζει εσένα, αλλά του αρέσει να το κάνει σε άλλους. Μερικές φορές μπορεί να φέρεται και σε σένα άσχημα. Θέλει να ελέγχει τους άλλους και κυρίους αυτούς που φαίνονται πιο ευαίσθητοι.

Πώς να τον αντιμετωπίσεις: Να θυμάσαι ότι δεν χρειάζεται να αρέσεις σε όλους. Δεν πειράζει αν δεν έχεις την έγκρισή του, μπορείς να βρεις άλλους φίλους. Να τον αποφεύγεις όσο μπορείς. Αν πιστεύεις ότι κάνει κακό σε κάποιον πες τον σε κάποιον ενήλικα που εμπιστεύεσαι.

SOURCE:

https://www.themamagers.gr/kid-issues/teenagers/efiveia-oi-arnitikoi-typoi-quot-filon-quot-kai-pos-tha-toys-diacheiristoyn-ta-paidia/(accessed 21.8.24)

Hush now, don’t explain: A perverse commentary on the 2024 riots

…From Stephen Reicher, Wardlaw Professor of Psychology, University of St. Andrews.

07 August 2024


After the 2011 riots, I was speaking to a senior police officer. He was telling me about a meeting he had with the then Communities Minister during the days and nights of unrest. He had tried to impress upon the minister that it was too early to know exactly what had happened let alone why it had happened. How can one explain something when one doesn't even know what that something is? The minister was abruptly dismissive. He was a politician in Government. He needed to be seen to be in charge. He needed a diagnosis and an instant solution. Little matter that the diagnosis (it was all about gangs and feral youth) and the solution turned out to be wrong. They had served their political purpose at the time.

Indeed, the Government response in 2011 can be summed up in a single sentence. When David Cameron stood up to introduce the parliamentary debate to the riots on the Thursday after the events, he declared that they were 'criminality pure and simple'. One thing that the study of crowds teaches you is that riots are rarely pure and never simple.

As I said to CNN at the time when they asked me to explain why there was rioting (it was a live program, otherwise I am sure they would never have broadcast the clip) – I don't know. And don't trust anyone who gives you an explanation, because they are speculating on the basis of little or nothing. Sometimes it makes sense to shut up for a while and listen. Especially if you are an academic. Always map a phenomenon before you offer your theories (something psychologists are not very good at doing).

I make these points as strong caveats now that, in 2024, we once again face a spreading wave of rioting and there is a clamour to provide answers. What is happening? Why is it happening? What does it tell us about our society? How do we deal with it? If you are expecting me to provide simple answers or indeed any answers then (like the CNN anchor who was temporarily speechless in the face of an interviewee saying 'I don't know) you will be sorely disappointed. What I can do, however, is to point to issues with the responses that have been provided so far.
Beyond the mindless mob

Let me start with the widespread assertion – by many commentators in the police, in the government and in the media – that this is 'mindless violence' by 'mindless mobs'. I understand the use of such claims to express utter dismay and disdain for the violent attacks on the police, asylum seekers, muslims and others. But they don't help as an explanation. Indeed they stand in the way of explanation.

To be more precise, they are problematic in at least three ways. First, they let the perpetrators off the hook. The rioters have not got carried away. They have not been carried to excess by the excitement of the crowd. This is certainly true of the far right. As is clear from their online posts, these people know exactly what they are doing. They are very clear in identifying their targets. Their actions reflect a conscious ideology.

Second, it is only by recognising that what happens in the crowds reflects a broader set of beliefs beyond the crowd that we can begin to address that ideology. Why do people buy into the right wing claims that immigrants and ethnic minorities are the source of their problems, that the authorities (government and police) collude in making this happen, that they are not to be trusted and indeed that they are part of the problem? Riots are always the canary in the cage. They reveal broader issues in society. The claim of 'mindlessness' serves to hide the signal they send.

Third, by suggesting that the problem lies in crowd psychology itself – which strips even the most reasonable individuals of their identity and transforms them into a howling mob – the 'mindlessness' trope serves to lump all crowds together, suggest that all crowds are at least potentially violent and leads to a clampdown on all forms of protest. This potentially increases the alienation of people from authority, and feeds into the underlying causes of the present unrest.

But crowds are not all the same. Those who gathered to defend mosques or to clean up after the violence were also in crowds. They too were subject to crowd psychology, expressing a group identity, acting in terms of group norms and values. But their norms were those of inclusion, solidarity and kindness not of division and hate (I shall return to these crowds presently). Every crowd is different as a function of the specific beliefs of the groups involved. Indeed even to lump the far-right rioters and those who opposed them together as 'protestors' is dangerous. These rioters did not come to protest. They came to intimidate and to attack asylum seekers, immigrants and ethnic minorities. They were deliberately using racist violence against individuals to achieve a political aim. That, as you will have noticed, is the definition of terrorism.
Crowds, media and the state of the nation

Another topic of widespread debate and multiple assertions is what the riots tell us about the state of the nation. More specifically, what do they tell us about immigration and its impact on social cohesion. If riots are indeed the canary in the cage, are they telling us that immigration has gone too far and unless it is addressed then 'civil war' is coming (as Elon Musk would have us believe)?

These are large and complex issues, not to be answered in a brief commentary. But I can at least point to some problems and biases in the assumptions behind the debate, in the ways in which it has been conducted and hence in some of the conclusions that have been drawn.

To start with, the large number of events – and the large number of people involved in events – seems to suggest that anti-immigrant anger is far greater than had previously been imagined. Yet, while an explicitly racist and anti-immigrant far right clearly played a key role in organising events and mobilising for them, and while members of far-right group were clearly present and prominent during the events, it is not true that they were alone and that we can therefore read the strength of the far right from the size of events. Indeed, anecdotal observations suggest that at least five types of group were present: besides members of far right, members of other organised groups such as football 'firms'; people opposed to immigration but not members of any groups; people (largely young men) antagonistic to the police; bystanders who had come to observe and film. These were not simple events but complex and multi-dimensional. We don't yet know the exact balance of different groups, their motives for attending and what they were prepared to do in the riots. This is a key area in which we need an accurate description before proffering explanations.

Additionally, even were it true that more people than hitherto have been out to express anti-immigrant views, this does not mean that there are more people than hitherto who hold such views. As I and others have previously argued, one of the core aspects of crowd events is a dynamic of empowerment. Gathered together with others sharing similar beliefs, cooperating to achieve their goals, people feel more able to act on the norms and values of their groups. Equally, seeing others expressing anti-immigrant sentiment – seemingly with impunity – empowers observers to do the same. It is not only physical crowds that have such an effect. Any form of collective expression can increase the willingness of people to act on beliefs where previously they lacked the confidence to do so. Thus, after the Brexit vote – widely represented as an anti-immigrant vote – hate crime in the UK rose by over 40%. All in all, it may not be that we have more opposition to immigration than hitherto, but that those who are anti-immigration are more confident than hitherto.

This confidence to act matters in another way. Often in human behaviour, what we think ourselves matter less than what we think others think. Our sense of broader social norms can encourage us to act even when we don't believe in something or, conversely, inhibit us from acting even when we do. So, when we are exposed to apparent evidence of widespread opposition to immigration it might not change our personal views, but it might make those who disagree more reticent in expressing themselves – thus initiating a 'spiral of silence' in which everybody believes that everybody else is anti-immigration and for such views then to dominate the debate.

Whether this happens or not depends not simply on the events themselves, but on how the events are represented. Here, the media play a critical role, as do biases in what counts as newsworthy. Every journalist knows the adage 'if it bleeds it leads'. Scenes of violence and mayhem, people throwing rocks and cars on fire will always trump a peaceful crowd or mundane acts of solidarity. Indeed the fact that we only tend to see crowds when they are violent (1,000 football matches on a Saturday afternoon and trouble at one – which will be in the Sunday news?) goes a long may towards explaining why we buy into the notion of crowds as inherently and hence mindlessly violent. So in the present events (and here again we need more systematic and accurate information) the numbers involved in the defence of asylum seekers, in the protection of mosques, in the clear up and rebuilding the morning after the violence before, generally greatly outnumbers the number of rioters.

The far right has long employed a strategy of creating disorder and chaos and then seeking to benefit from it. In this case, cause mayhem by attacking immigrants and then blaming immigrants for the disorder. The very real danger is that the representation of the current riots plays into that strategy. It is not that Britain is strongly anti-immigration – if anything the figures suggest that we are one of the most tolerant countries in Europe and becoming more so. It is that we come to see ourselves as such. To do so would be to reward the rioters for their actions.
Conclusion

I have been longer than I meant to be. It is one of the consequences of the complexity of crowds. 'They are mindless' will, in its brevity, often win out over more accurate but more nuanced explanations. Moreover, in all that I have said, I certainly don't pretend to have explained the riots. What I hope to have done is to warn against the danger of jumping to conclusions. If we set off precipitately in the wrong direction, we will never understand or address the violence and disorder of this summer.

The demand for careful analysis may not satisfy the media clamour for instant diagnosis. It may not satisfy the political imperative to demonstrate mastery. But like slow food versus fast food, the result is always more satisfying, more nutritious and far better for our well-being in the long term.

Photo above: Local children Sebastian Taylor, aged 10, and his sister Evelyn Taylor, aged seven, sweep up the street outside a Mosque that was attacked last night during civil disorder on July 31, 2024 in Southport, England.

SOURCE:

https://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/hush-now-dont-explain-perverse-commentary-2024-riots(accessed 19.08.24)

The transformative power of wild water

Our editor Dr Jon Sutton watches ‘Wild Water’, accompanied by a Q&A with the film’s director Ben Davis.

09 August 2024


It's dark on the hill up to Gaddings Dam, an 1830s mill pond on the West Yorkshire moors. The group set off, torches picking out the steep path. Their early start and exertions are rewarded as the dawn breaks just when they arrive at the water, and they strip down to their cossies and slip in together under the rising sun.

We go on to see the pond in all weathers and temperatures, ever-changing but always enticing for those hardy wild swimmers. Gaddings Dam, says director Ben Davis, is the central character in his film, to hang the swimmers' life stories from.

And all the stuff of life is there: all the challenge and change. I'll leave this 'spoiler free', but two aspects stood out for me.

Firstly, community. The enthusiasm of wild swimmers is clearly infectious. Even 'Corner Man' didn't stay on his own for long; people end up swimming together (wise for safety anyway), and sharing tears, laughter and cake. It's a space that's non-judgemental (including, Director Ben Davis noted in the Q&A which followed this screening, around body image). More experienced dippers such as Clive take newbies under their wings. Even the hordes who invade England's highest beach in the summer are spoken about with generosity (although not so much by those locals at the base of the hill, who feel Countryfile – and presumably films like this – have a lot to answer for).

Secondly, the transformative power of water. If you Google 'the psychological benefits of open water swimming', you'll find a flood of studies around this. Many, as is often the way with the more naturalistic psychological research, will say 'Issues remain with study quality', and around correlation vs causation. But really, for me, the point of this film is that the transformation starts the moment that alarm goes off at 4:30am. Or, less dramatically, when the husband finally agrees to try a shared hobby even if he's only going to stay in for three minutes. Sure, there are presumably all sorts of physiological changes associated with immersion in cold water, and it makes sense that there's a burgeoning field of research around that. But when you hear a participant in this film say that someone at work had joked about the idea of them doing a triathlon, and they thought 'I'll show them', and soon they were up on the Dam… well, the transformation must be well underway before they dip a toe in the water.

The links between wild swimming, mental health and life change were even more explicit in the mini-documentary which preceded this particular screening at the Phoenix Theatre in Leicester. 'Tonic of the Sea', by filmmaker Jonathan J. Scott, highlights Katie Maggs' recovery from anxiety, myaclonic seizures and stress related burnout through daily dawn swimming in the sea. The film starts with the sound of breathing, in and out, and Katie saying 'I was desperate to find my way back to me'. Again it was notable that Katie wasn't on her own on this journey – she met Mike on the beach, 'the swimmers found me… Mike came along at the right time'. 'It's beautiful to be involved in,' Mike said: 'I'm witnessing what's going on with her on a daily basis.'

I asked Davis whether he felt his film had ended up being representative of the prominence of mental health issues and neurodivergence in the wild swimming community; or whether the characters who, by his admission, 'fell by the wayside' in not making the cut, were more likely to be those who simply liked a bit of a swim. He replied that the Outdoor Swimming Society had been somewhat wary of losing sight of the message that people can swim just for the joy of swimming, without having problems. Davis said he hoped he had still got that into the film, while being realistic about the emotional heft of the 'big stories'. 'The people who come forward are very keen to share their story… you turn the camera on and it all comes out.' The main message of his film, Davis said, is 'Look how transformative clean water can be on people's lives… it's our right, and why we haven't got that, I just can't understand it.'

Mike in Tonic of the Sea also spoke to the immediacy of the transformative power of water. 'If you've done something that is exceptional – and whenever you say to people "we go swimming before the sun rises, in the sea, in the wild sea", suddenly their perception of you changes a little bit, because they think "oh gosh I couldn't do that' – that, in building up a sense of self-worth and achievement, is massively important.'

In wild water, then, we can find both solitude and companionship; a space for difference that is also 'the great equaliser'; somewhere we truly feel the dark just before the dawn. So whatever you find yourself immersed in, sit with the shock, breathe in and breathe out, and move forward.

SOURCE:

https://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/transformative-power-wild-water(accessed 12.08.24)

Life lessons from the Olympics

Can sports psychologists help everyone to win at life? Deputy Editor Jennifer Gledhill speaks with some to find out if an Olympic mindset could benefit us all…

02 July 2024


Participating in the Olympics surely has the potential to take anyone to the brink. You've spent your whole life training for that split-second opportunity to grab a medal, and the whole world will be watching you win or lose. In recent games, the spotlight has shone on the psychological cost of competing at such a level. When Simone Biles pulled out of her gymnastic events at the Tokyo Olympics stating, 'At the end of the day, we're not just entertainment, we're human beings,' she brought the mental challenges that elite sportsmen and women face to the foreground.

No wonder then, that the role sports psychologists play in their work with athletes now feels more widely recognised and appreciated. Dr Chris Rowley, Deputy Head of the School of Psychology at Leeds Trinity University, has worked with British Olympians and says that his role is two-fold: 'it may be sport-specific reasons why an athlete has sought out psychological support in the first place, but the work that I typically do with my clients tends to place the spotlight on their very human experiencing of their sporting endeavours, aside from the attention and accolades.'

So, the first job of a sports psychologist sounds like it involves putting to one side the drive for medals and discovering what helps each athlete thrive as an individual? 'Absolutely' says Dr Andrew Manley, head of sport, exercise and health sciences at Leeds Beckett who has a long history of supporting Olympians.

'Put simply, we look at understanding human behaviour that happens to be within a sporting context. What is most important for all of us is to acknowledge is that we sometimes need tools and support to keep mentally well. Whatever your goal is – whether it's to be a concert pianist or a top CEO – it starts with getting the foundations right. Asking yourself if you are okay, physically and mentally, is always the first port of call. As a sports psychologist, we are working with people who are often perceived as superhuman because they have certain physical, genetic, and mental qualities. You don't get to be part of that club without a huge amount of talent, but… they don't do it all on their own. They will need support and tools to keep mentally well – like all of us.'
Put well-being before winning

Dr Stacy Winter, associate professor in applied sport psychology at St Mary's University in Twickenham, who has worked with Olympians from pre-London 2012 to the upcoming Paris 2024 Games, also welcomed Biles sharing her story.

'Her decision was a powerful illustration of an elite athlete making a choice based on what was best for her as a person. We've seen an increasing number of Olympic and professional athletes speaking openly about their mental health battles. These messages are often in contrast to their superhuman media portrayals and exacerbated by the "win at all costs" sporting cultures many are exposed to. Hearing more and more athletes share their stories has helped normalise seeking psychological help. The takeaway we can all get from this is we don't have to be in crisis to ask for support, we can benefit from it at any time in our lives.'

Rowley agrees. 'Historically there was a stigma attached to sports psychology; the suggestion being that it was there for athletes who were "struggling" or "needed help". This understandably left some athletes feeling reluctant to get support.

Thankfully, over time, and with several high-profile athletes endorsing the benefits of working with a psychologist, appreciation and awareness have helped our field to grow and develop considerably, despite it still being a relatively young and emerging field of research and academic study.'
Nurture your positive relationships

And just as with psychological approaches in other communities, Manley is keen to stress that there's not a one-size-fits-all formula when it comes to helping athletes succeed and thrive. 'Every person is different, but a starting point when I work with an athlete is to have a real, honest look at the relationships they have with others. Which ones serve and support them? We are relational beings and none of us can achieve great things without positive relationships. Are they spending time nurturing and maintaining the ones they have?

Or, on the flip side, do they need to ask whether other relationships are no longer supporting them to get to where they want to be? This is something that we all need to do from time to time. I would say what's different about Olympic athletes is that they put a lot of pressure on themselves. You'll find that they are incredibly passionate and driven, but to the point in which they forget that it's okay to ask for support, and it's okay to lean on others.'

Manley adds that relationships for elite sports people can come under a tremendous amount of strain and in some ways, the work with them is the same as what psychologists may do with people outside the sporting field. 'It's essential to have a network of people to support you.

Relationship science has been a hallmark of the work I've done with Olympians, but I think it's relevant for everyone; identify your support network; the people who you can rely on for honesty and support, then nurture them. Equally, don't put off having honest conversations with people whose relationships are causing you a bit of a challenge.'
Focus on your values, not just your goals

When we have a singular goal in our lives – we might safely assume that for Olympians it's, 'get to the Olympics and win something' – and it doesn't work out, how do we recover from the loss?

'It can feel catastrophic' says Dr Luke Barnes, chartered sport and exercise psychologist at Leeds Trinity University. 'Obviously, we are looking at how we can support them to perform under intense pressure to the best of their ability and reach their goals, but, just as importantly, I work with the athlete to gain a sense of purpose as a person. Nothing is going to replace what you may have lost through injury or a crushing defeat, but we will work at looking to find that silver lining. I think this outlook is relevant to all of us when something doesn't work out, first to acknowledge the loss rather than going straight into problem-solving mode but also to really focus on what gives you a sense of meaning in your life. I often use Acceptance and Commitment Therapy interventions; if an injury or something else unexpected happens that means athletes can't reach their goal of winning, then we need to focus on what else is purposeful for them. That may be helping others succeed in the sport they love or being involved with sport directly or indirectly.'

Rowley agrees that it's always beneficial for athletes (and us) to take a bird's eye view of our journey so far. 'Reframing the concept of success and individual achievement may not serve to eradicate any performance-related anxiety that an athlete will experience in those pivotal moments before, during and after competition. However, by encouraging them to reflect on the hard work they have invested to even be at the Olympics and recognise ways in which their respective sporting stories can continue after the Olympics have finished can be meaningful. For a lot of Olympians, their real indicator of success might have been to qualify in the first instance, or it might be that they achieve a new personal best at the games without necessarily troubling the podium. Seeing the games as a chapter in an athlete's ongoing and developing career story to date can help with the pressure that naturally comes with being a part of a global spectacle.'

And when that pressure of being on the world stage gets overwhelming and threatens an athlete being able to perform at their best, how do sports psychologists help them stay focused and drown out excess noise? And what can help us when we are trying to combat pre-performance nerves and stop the inner critic from taking hold?
Prepare in a way that works for you

'Unsurprisingly, it depends on the individual' says Winter. 'Our job is to home in on what may be helpful to them even if that doesn't necessarily work for anyone else. You may see two athletes lining up for the same event, one might be looking super-relaxed, joking around, and playing up to the cameras… think Usain Bolt… yet the next person could be utterly focused and not say a word or make eye contact. This pre-race attitude will be serving them in some way, they will have learnt what works for them and enables them to focus. That said, their needs won't just vary because of who they are as an individual, it will also be dependent on their sport. Some Olympians might be competing for hours – compare a marathon to a 100m sprint! For a marathon runner, it can be helpful to allow your mind to wander and become distracted to the discomfort. They may not want to stay focused during some moments.'

Barnes agrees that visualisation and distraction techniques can be useful in longer races, having worked with race walker, Callum Wilkinson, who represented Team GB in the Tokyo Olympics (see box). 'Rather than focusing on the whole 20km race, we will break that down into milestones and stages, using visualisation. I may say "What do you want to be thinking about at this stage?" Or "How would you want to respond if this challenge came up?". Being flexible and able to adapt to whatever comes up on the day, whether that's a change in weather or how a fellow athlete responds to you is essential.'

But how does anyone prepare for all eventualities, there's so many things that could get in the way of a good event – sickness, false starts, a spectator running across the track, the list could be endless! 'Just like in the rest of life, we could worry about every eventuality,' says Winter.

'Instead, how about asking what is within our control and what isn't? There are a million different scenarios that could happen to us and nine times out of ten, they are ones that we couldn't have second-guessed. We don't want our athletes to worry about everything. If you are naturally quite pessimistic, analysing every possible scenario won't be helpful. It's a case of striking that balance between being as prepared as possible but also trusting in the process that's got you there in the first place. I mean, Olympians are at the Olympics for a reason. You don't suddenly start doing something different when you get there. For some athletes though, they will know that they'll never compete at the Olympics again and it may be a challenge to appreciate the moment rather than how they feel about coming to the end of their competing career.'
Using mindfulness to stay in the moment

And maybe staying in the present is the biggest challenge for all of us, let alone when you have worked your whole life for one pivotal moment. Can sports psychologists offer strategies to help athletes feel present and actually enjoy the Olympics when they're there?

'Mindfulness-based activities can be of real value,' says Rowley. 'This approach helped one athlete who I worked closely with during the Tokyo Olympics, enabling them to connect with the current moment both in terms of performance potential and during their downtime by helping to accept distracting thoughts or concerns that might have impacted their performance. There is often merit in taking time to discuss their experiences in relative real-time with a view to getting the most out of what is likely to be a career highlight for them, regardless of whether they are a debutant or a seasoned Olympian. What we experience at any given moment in time, whether that is as an athlete competing at the Olympics, or spending time with a friend or having a bit of solitude and respite, all these moments can offer significance and value if we are alert and mindful to that possibility. It is an easy thing to say, but it is often a lot harder to act upon it and to recognise this value on a regular basis.'

'Music can really help us stay in the moment.' says Manley, 'It's proven to be very much associated with emotion and memory and can help us focus attention on to the things that matter. You may have seen images of Michael Phelps keeping his headphones on right up to the second before he gets in the pool. In fact, he has spoken about how it helped him to relax and get into his own world. For other athletes, this may not be as effective, and we then find a different strategy. It might be we use some positive self-talk. A kind of an internal voice, helping them to focus on what matters and shut down other distractions. Other athletes might love the crowd. They don't need to zone out and they may use the atmosphere in a stadium to get to a certain level of emotion. It's about tailoring a technique to work for you, it may be underpinned by the same theoretical principles, but what you use will differ, the purpose is to focus your attention on what really matters to you.'
Regular heroes

So, whether an Olympian or not, do we share many similar struggles simply because we're human? 'Completely,' says Rowley, 'the Olympians that I have had the pleasure of working with are fundamentally nice, normal people. The idea that they are 'superhuman' certainly stands as a testament to the incredible amount of energy they invest into their event, but behind all of that, is a regular person who just happens to be amazing at their sport. There is often very little which seems to separate them from a teacher, nurse, or any other of our countless and more understated 'regular' heroes.

And therefore, the strategies that support an elite athlete, although tailored to suit the extraordinary highs and lows they will no doubt encounter, have relevance for all of us. Whether this is working on acceptance when stuff happens that is out of our control or using mindfulness techniques to appreciate the here and now.

Perhaps keeping in mind Dr Barnes' question is helpful; 'if you had a piece of card and you wrote all the good things about life on one side, and all the bad things on the other? Would you rather have the card with both the good and bad? Or rip it up and have nothing? It's a good reminder to us all that there is no happiness or positivity without suffering, but by being guided by our own value compass can help us zone in on what's really meaningful.'
'I will always be driven and focused… I would assume most Olympians are!'

Race-walker Callum Wilkinson is the reigning UK 20km champion and has competed in the 2020 Tokyo Olympics. He has worked with Chartered Psychologist Luke Barnes during his career.

'I've wanted to be an Olympian since I was about three years old. One of my first memories is watching the fireworks at the Sydney Olympics on the TV. When it was announced in 2005 that the Olympics were coming to London, I told my friend in the playground at school that I was going to compete in them one day. I must ask him if he remembers that…

I think because I had visualised it for so long, when I actually made it into the stadium, it wasn't too much of a shock to my system, it was exactly how I imagined it. There is obviously nothing bigger than the Olympics for an athlete: when I made it to Tokyo and came 10th in the 20k race walk, it was an amazing result for me.

Working with a psychologist is very different to, say, a performance coach, which is very much based on improving my athletic capabilities. My focus with Luke is around what is going on internally for me. The emphasis is on my well-being and making sure that my environment and surroundings are positive and conducive to me being happy and healthy.

Even though I'm not one to struggle with nerves before a competition, where I can get overwhelmed is juggling life outside of my sport and Luke supports me with this. I am so motivated, I have to work on finding time to focus on the stuff that goes on in the rest of my life, for example when I'm moving house or going on holiday there is the risk my mind is elsewhere.

Being an athlete, you are sometimes in your own little bubble and can forget that there is a life outside of your sport. Injury is also a huge obstacle for athletes. I'm a regular in the MRI scanning machine and it can be a real challenge having to take time out of racing because of a physical problem. Working with Luke, I can talk about how that feels and therefore cope with the disappointment when I am injured and not view it as such an attack on my identity.

I will always be driven and focused… it's part of my personality and I would assume most Olympians are! If I develop an interest in something, then I'll take it as far as it can go – whether that's racing, supporting my favourite football team or finding the perfect cup of coffee!'

SOURCE:

https://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/life-lessons-olympics(accessed 12.08.24)

“Είναι τα μωρά μου, αλλά δεν τα γέννησα”: Πώς νιώθει μια μαμά που υιοθέτησε τα παιδιά της

ΚΕΛΛΥ ΑΛΕΞΑΛΗ23 ΙΑΝΟΥΑΡΙΟΥ, 2023

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‘Τα μωρά μου είναι δικά μου, αλλά δεν τα γέννησα.


Έχω δύο παιδιά — περίεργα, γλυκά, πεισματάρα, τρελά, έξυπνα και πολύ χαρούμενα παιδιά. Μας ήρθαν με υιοθεσία και ολοκληρώνουν την οικογένειά μας. Όπως πολλές άλλες μαμάδες μικρών παιδιών, οι μέρες μου περνούν κυνηγώντας νήπια, πλένοντας άπειρα ρούχα, δημιουργώντας όρια, διδάσκοντας μαθήματα ζωής, ποδηλασία, μαγείρεμα, καθάρισμα, σκούπισμα μύτης, διαβάζοντας ιστορίες πριν τον ύπνο και, τέλος, πέφτω στο κρεβάτι. Το τέλος της ημέρας.

Και όπως κάθε μαμά, αναρωτιέμαι αν τα κάνω καλά. Μερικές φορές ανησυχώ ότι δεν είμαι αρκετή. Αναρωτιέμαι αν τους έχουμε προετοιμάσει να κάνουν τις σωστές επιλογές ως έφηβοι ή να επιλέξουν τα σωστά μονοπάτια ως νέοι ενήλικες. Ελπίζω να τους διδάσκω αρκετά για την καλοσύνη, τη γενναιοδωρία, την ταπεινοφροσύνη, τον αυτοέλεγχο και οτιδήποτε άλλο θέλουμε να γνωρίζουν οι μικροσκοπικοί μας άνθρωποι. Ειλικρινά, δεν έχω ιδέα τι κάνω, αλλά ελπίζω σίγουρα να είναι αρκετό.

Ως μαμά με υιοθεσία, έχω μερικές μοναδικές ανησυχίες.


Απ’ έξω, είμαι μια μαμά όπως κάθε άλλη μαμά στον κόσμο. Θέλουμε το καλύτερο και υψηλότερο για τα παιδιά μας. Αντίθετα, σε αντίθεση με τις περισσότερες μαμάδες, ανησυχώ επίσης μήπως μου κάνουν τις δύσκολες ερωτήσεις σχετικά με την υιοθεσία, κάτι που υποπτεύομαι ότι είναι προ των πυλών με το τετράχρονο παιδί μου. Αναρωτιέμαι πώς θα είναι οι μελλοντικές σχέσεις με τους βιολογικούς τους γονείς. Αναρωτιέμαι πώς θα νιώσουν όταν μάθουν ότι οι βιολογικές μαμάδες τους έχουν γεννήσει και μεγαλώσει άλλα παιδιά. Και μερικές φορές ανησυχώ για την ψυχική υγεία του παιδιού μου, καθώς η βιολογική του μητέρα είχε τέτοια προβλήματα. Έτσι, το να είμαι μητέρα μέσω της υιοθεσίας φέρνει μοναδικές διαφορές με τις άλλες μαμάδες που αναπόφευκτα θα έχω τόσο εγώ όσο και τα παιδιά μου στο μέλλον.


Από τη στιγμή που μαθαίνουμε ότι πλησιάζει η στιγμή να έρθει το παιδί στο σπίτι, ο κόσμος είναι λίγο διαφορετικός για εμάς τις θετές μαμάδες, από την πρώτη συνάντηση μέχρι την ψυχολογική προετοιμασία αλλά και αυτή του σπιτιού. Δεν νομίζω ότι νιώθουμε ποτέ πραγματικά ασφαλείς. Είναι ασφαλές να πιστέψεις ότι αυτό το μωρό θα έρθει σπίτι μαζί σου: Ασφαλές ώστε να διακοσμήσεις το βρεφικό δωμάτιο ή να το πεις στην οικογένειά σου και στους φίλους σου, από φόβο μήπως σε συντρίψει το αδιανόητο.

Ως μαμά μέσω υιοθεσίας, η θλίψη και η χαρά συχνά συνυπάρχουν.

Αν, όπως εγώ, υιοθετείτε ένα βρέφος και είστε παρούσες στο νοσοκομείο, συνεχίζετε να κρατάτε την αναπνοή σας μέχρι να υπογράψουν τα έγγραφα υιοθεσίας. Η εμπειρία του νοσοκομείου είναι το πιο όμορφο, λυπητερό τραγούδι που έχετε ακούσει ποτέ. Κάποτε άκουσα να το λένε γάμο και κηδεία στο ίδιο δωμάτιο. Ερωτεύεστε αυτό το μωρό, αλλά νομικά δεν είναι δικό σας. Προσπαθείτε να δείξετε ευαισθησία στα συναισθήματα της βιολογικής μητέρας που προσπαθεί να μείνει γενναία.

Όταν πήρα αγκαλιά τον νεογέννητο γιο μου, είχα πλήρη επίγνωση ότι ήταν ένα δώρο να τον κρατάω τόσο κοντά στο σώμα μου. Αλλά ένιωθα και απατεώνας. Τότε με χτύπησε απροσδόκητη θλίψη χωρίς να το θέλω. Αυτή ήταν μια από τις καλύτερες στιγμές της ενήλικης ζωής μου αλλά εγώ θρηνούσα. Όλες οι γυναίκες σε εκείνο τον όροφο του νοσοκομείου είχαν μόλις φέρει μια ζωή σε αυτόν τον κόσμο, κάτι που το σώμα μου δεν θα μου επέτρεπε ποτέ να κάνω.

«Τι ακριβώς έχω κάνει για να αξίζω αυτό το παιδί;»

Η σκέψη ήταν σπαρακτική και απρόσκλητη, αλλά αυτή είναι η σκέψη που με συνέθλιβε. Και δεν σταματά εκεί. Δεδομένου ότι πάλεψα με τη στειρότητα για πολλά χρόνια, η θλίψη εμφανίζεται περιστασιακά. Όταν κάποιος που γνωρίζω μένει έγκυος (και τόσο εύκολα, φαίνεται), θα έλεγα ψέματα αν σας έλεγα ότι δεν με τσούζει ακόμα. Όχι, δεν είναι τίποτα όπως πριν, αλλά εξακολουθεί να υπάρχει πόνος όταν συμβαίνει. Αυτό που κάποτε ήταν μια γροθιά στο στομάχι, τώρα μοιάζει περισσότερο με θραύσμα. Αυτά τα συναισθήματα θα υπάρχουν πιθανώς πάντα σε κάποιο βαθμό και νιώθω όλο και πιο άνετα με αυτό. Αυτά τα συναισθήματα είναι φυσιολογικά και πιθανότατα μέρος της διαδικασίας επούλωσης.

Ως μαμά μέσω υιοθεσίας, είμαι απόλυτα ευλογημένη.

Η υιοθεσία είναι ένα όμορφο χάος, το οποίο, με τη σειρά του, ήταν η μεγαλύτερη ευλογία στη ζωή ολόκληρης της οικογένειάς μου. Μετά από μια δύσκολη περίοδο υπογονιμότητας, επιλέξαμε την υιοθεσία. Τα παιδιά μου είναι ακριβώς αυτό – τα παιδιά μου. Και εξαιτίας τους, είμαι μαμά και μάλιστα «κανονική» μαμά!

Αν και μπορεί να μην το ξέρω ποτέ με βεβαιότητα, νομίζω ότι είναι ασφαλές να υποθέσω ότι είμαι ακριβώς όπως κάθε άλλη μαμά, αν και έκανα ένα ελαφρώς διαφορετικό ταξίδι για να φτάσω εδώ. Και η ζωή μας θα είναι λίγο διαφορετική στο μέλλον”.

Πηγή:https://www.themamagers.gr/prosexos-mama/yiothesia/quot-einai-ta-mora-moy-alla-den-ta-gennisa-quot-pos-niothei-mia-mama-poy-yiothetise-ta-paidia-tis/(accessed 8.8.24)

Πώς να μυήσετε τα μεγάλα παιδιά που δεν «διαβάζουν» στην απόλαυση της ανάγνωσης

Αγγελική Λάλου
25 Ιουλίου 2024



Με τη βοήθεια των κόμικς!


Για πολλά παιδιά το καλοκαίρι είναι η εποχή που σημαίνει επιτέλους αποχή από το διάβασμα… και τα βιβλία!

Ανάγνωση όμως δεν είναι μόνο το διάβασμα και η μελέτη για το σχολείο.

Τα παιδιά όσο μεγαλώνουν και κυρίως στην εφηβεία, κι ακόμα πιο πολύ όταν πηγαίνουν στις μεγάλες τάξεις του λυκείου, χάνουν λίγο κάποιες φορές την επαφή τους με το εξωσχολικό διάβασμα και τη λογοτεχνία. Λίγο οι αυξημένες υποχρεώσεις για το σχολείο, λίγο το άγχος για τις εξετάσεις και τις επιδόσεις, λίγο οι άλλες δραστηριότητες, αθλήματα, ξένες γλώσσες, φροντιστήρια – ο ελεύθερος χρόνος τους μειώνεται σημαντικά και τον ελάχιστο που τους απομένει δεν θέλουν να τον διαθέτουν σε επιπλέον διάβασμα…


Εκτός κι αν το διάβασμα αυτό μπορούν να το συνδέσουν με κάτι που τους ξεκουράζει, τους χαλαρώνει και τους κάνει να περνάνε υπέροχα. Όλα τα βιβλία το κάνουν αυτό, αλλά τα κόμικς είναι λίγο περισσότερο δελεαστικά στα εφηβάκια για τους εξής λόγους:Έχουν εικόνες κι όχι μόνο γράμματα

Η εικονογράφηση παίζει μεγάλο ρόλο, όχι γιατί τους αφαιρεί κείμενο κι έχουν να διαβάσουν λιγότερο… αλλά γιατί ζωντανεύει τη δράση κι είναι σαν να παρακολουθούν ένα επεισόδιο αγαπημένης σειράς ή αγαπημένης ταινίαςΕξασκούν τη συγκέντρωση και την προσοχή στη λεπτομέρεια

Μπορεί να σας φαίνονται απλά τα κόμικς, αλλά στην πραγματικότητα δεν είναι – για να απολαύσεις στο μέγιστο το αποτέλεσμα που προσφέρουν πρέπει να έχεις ακονισμένες τις αναγνωστικές σου δεξιότητες, καθώς ανατρέχει το βλέμμα από καρέ σε καρέ και πρέπει να προσέχει και το κείμενο αλλά και τη δράση στις εικόνες.Η δράση τους είναι γρήγορη και δεν τη βαριέσαι

Στην εποχή τους, που έχουν συνηθίσει τους γρήγορους ρυθμούς, θέλουν και αυτό που διαβάζουν να έχει γρήγορες εναλλαγές, δράση, περιπέτεια, χιούμορ, σασπένς, να μιλάει στην ηλικία και στις ανησυχίες τους και να κάνει το μυαλό και τη σκέψη τους να ξεφεύγει από το άγχος και την πίεση της καθημερινότητάς τους.
Οι ήρωές τους έχουν υπερδυνάμεις και είναι cool

Οι υπέρ-ήρωες είναι πάντα στη μόδα – αλλά και ο Λούκι Λουκ, ο Τεν Τεν, ο Αστερίξ και ο Οβελίξ έχουν πολλές θαυμαστές ιδιότητες και χαρακτηριστικά που ψάχνουν οι έφηβοι στους ήρωές τους. Σούπερ μαν, Σπάιντερμαν, Κατ γούμαν, Μπάτμαν αλλά και νέες γενιές υπερηρώων περιμένουν να μοιραστούν με το νεαρό κοινό τις περιπέτειές τους.

Τα κόμικς δεν είναι μόνο υπερήρωες

Πλέον κυκλοφορούν στα ελληνικά υπέροχα βιβλία σε έκδοση κόμικς. Αριστουργήματα της παγκόσμιας λογοτεχνίας, όπως ο «Δον Κιχώτης» του Θερβάντες (εκδ. Χαραμάδα), η Μεταμόρφωση του Κάφκα (εκδ. Οξύ), αλλά και κλασικά ελληνικά όπως ο «Ερωτόκριτος» του Κορνάρου (εκδ. Polaris), αλλά και θέματα ιστορίας όπως το «Στη μάχη των Θερμοπυλών» και «Στη Μάχη του Μαραθώνα» της Κατερίνας Σέρβη (εικονογράφηση: Θανάσης Πέτρου, εκδ. Πατάκη) δίνουν στα μεγάλα παιδιά τη δυνατότητα να διατηρήσουν την επαφή τους με τη λογοτεχνία και σημαντικά διαχρονικά κείμενα.



Από τις εκδόσεις Οξύ κυκλοφορεί μια μεγάλη ποικιλία από τα καλύτερα graphic novels της Marvel κι όχι μόνο…. που μπορείτε να δείτε εδώ περισσότερα

Εξίσου καλή επιλογή είναι και τα κλασικά εικονογραφημένα που κυκλοφορούν από τις εκδόσεις Οξύ με επιλογές από τους “3 σωματοφύλακες”, την “Αινιάδα” μέχρι και το “Ρωμαίος και Ιουλιέτα” – βρείτε εδώ περισσότερες κλασικές επιλογές.Βοηθάνε στη σύνδεση μεταξύ γονιών και παιδιού

Γιατί αν ψάξετε στα δικά σας πράγματα που φυλάτε από την παιδική σας ηλικία ίσως βρείτε τη δική σας συλλογή κόμικς, την οποία μπορείτε να τη δείξετε ή και να τη μοιραστείτε με τα παιδιάς σας και να μιλήσετε για τους δικούς σας αγαπημένους ήρωες!



Τα κόμικς προσφέρουν διέξοδο στη φαντασία, ανεβάζουν την αδρεναλίνη αλλά δίνουν και αφορμές για σκέψη, προβληματισμό, συζήτηση. Ψυχαγωγούν αλλά ταυτόχρονα προάγουν τη δημιουργικότητα, τη σύνθετη σκέψη, και συνδέουν τη διαδικασία του διαβάσματος και της ανάγνωσης με κάτι απολαυστικό και ξεκούραστο, σε μια εποχή της ζωής τους που έχουν πολλές υποχρεώσεις και λίγο ελεύθερο χρόνο.

ΠΗΓΗ:

https://childit.gr/%ce%bc%ce%b5-%cf%84%ce%b7-%ce%b2%ce%bf%ce%ae%ce%b8%ce%b5%ce%b9%ce%b1-%cf%84%cf%89%ce%bd-%ce%ba%cf%8c%ce%bc%ce%b9%ce%ba%cf%82/(accessed 5.8.24)

19 ways to improve your life

Well, at least make things a little easier! Here’s a collection of some our favourite life hacks from a selection of psychologists and experts we have interviewed over the years…

27 June 2024

Don't stress about not feeling happy

We're often bombarded with surveys that announce where the 'happiest place to live' is, or which habits we should be adopting to be happier. But researchers in Canada have discovered that actively pursuing happiness led participants to think of time as being scarce, which made them unhappy. They noted, 'This finding adds depth to the growing body of work suggesting that the pursuit of happiness can ironically undermine wellbeing'. Letting go of the 'must do better at being happy' goal may actually improve things after all!
Instead, think about creating a rich life

And we're talking in psychological not monetary terms! A psychologically rich life is characterised by plenty of interesting and perspective-changing events. These experiences don't necessarily have to feel good at the time; they might even be traumatic, but in a 2021 study, US-based psychologists Shigehiro Oshi and Erin Westgate argued in a paper in Psychological Review that work to understand the meaning of a 'good life' had missed a crucial dimension, which they called psychological richness.
Think about stripping back

A happier life may also involve having less. 'We are overloaded.' Says Matt Haig, speaking to our Editor, Jon Sutton. 'We are in a world of infinite choice. TV shows, books, friends, careers, travel (for some), where we get our news, apps, podcasts, food, cosmetics. We're simply not made for all the thousands of micro-decisions we're expected to make in a day. It's about editing our lives so that they make sense again. '
Got a goal? Give yourself a WOOP!

WOOP stands for Wish, Outcome, Obstacles, Plan. Begin by identifying what you 'wish' for in as much detail as possible. Don't be vague by just stating something like, 'I want to lose weight' but, rather, set specific goals such as 'I want to lose 10lbs'. The more specific, the more tangible and achievable goals are. They provide a measurable yardstick for progress. 'Just wishing for a goal is not enough', says Bruce Hood in The Science of Happiness. He points to a study by psychologist, Gabrielle Oettingen who found that we also need to consider future obstacles and how we might overcome them.
And if the goal is too challenging?

'Set a lower target and start again, but don't set different goals until you've achieved the one you're working on.' Says Professor Charles Abraham, Head of Psychology Applied to Health at the University of Exeter. Celebrating reaching a goal, however 'small' you perceive it to be, will give you a sense of achievement. This is just one of our evidence-based tips from The Psychologist Guide to… Healthy Living, written by journalist Ella Rhodes. All of our practical Guides can be found here.
Think of the journey not the destination

Many psychological studies have focused on how to achieve goals rather than how to maintain behaviours after people have met their goals. Researchers at the Stanford Graduate School of Business studying people who had recently achieved a goal noted a difference in people who were prompted to see their achievements as 'the completion of a journey' in comparison to those who weren't offered this metaphor. Those who thought about the journey were much more likely to be using the practices they had used towards their goal six months after achieving it.
Use 'regret' to your advantage

Viewing the feeling of regret as a positive emotion, may sound a little topsy turvy but in her book, You Only Die Once, Jodi Wellman explains that by getting curious about what past regrets mean to you, you can help to steer your decisions in a healthier and happier direction. In an exclusive extract, Jodi Wellman wrote: 'If you've been beating yourself up for a transgression or mistake from days gone by, it might be time to reframe it as a helpful tutorial in what not to do / what to do moving forward. You're doing the best you can.' Sounds much more compassionate!
Find a garden to benefit from

Ecopsychologist, Theodore Roszak believed that we each have an ecological unconsciousness embedded within the core of our minds and when exposed to the natural environment we can harvest the benefits of health, sanity and contentment. And the good news is, you don't have to travel far to get the benefits, whether it's the local park or your own back yard.
Avoid 'binge vacationing'

Taking only one long holiday per year, may not give us the rest that our systems really need. Instead, says, Jessica De Bloom from the University of Tampere, it may benefit us to take regular long weekends and short vacations, as well as to be curious about how to integrate 'holiday happiness' into everyday life, such as lunch time swims, evening board games and home town explorations.
Normalise not-knowing stuff

Struggling with imposter syndrome? There are several techniques you can use to tackle feeling not-quite good enough and Dr Hayley Lewis shared six of these in her recent BPS webinar. How about taking a leaf out of Nobel Prize winning physicist, Reichard Feynman's book, who celebrated the fact he didn't know everything and kept a pad titled 'Notebook of things I don't know about' to keep abreast of them. Turning 'not-knowing' into a challenge rather than something to be ashamed of sounds good to us.
Shiver in your daily shower

A 30-day event in the Netherlands that involved more than 3000 people taking daily showers that ran cold for at least the last 30 seconds each time had some positive findings. Researchers found there was a 29 per cent reduction in sickness absence for those who took the chilly challenge compared with their colleagues who didn't.
Want to make more friends? Show your vulnerabilities

Whether that's by declaring a secret crush, revealing our physical insecurities or admitting to a serious mistake at work, psychological studies show that even though we assume we will be judged harshly for our confessions, the opposite happens. What occurs is that others see our confessions as a sign as authenticity. Time to 'fess up.
Dis-habituate to renew feelings of joy

'When we become habituated to things that bring us joy, the risk is that we quickly stop reacting to the happiness they can bring,' says Tali Sharot in her book, Look Again. 'Amazing food, great trips, expensive cars etc, will trigger a burst of joy if you experience them occasionally. But once those experiences become frequent, they stop producing real pleasure and instead, they produce comfort – which is entirely different.' Her advice? Sometimes it can be as simple as taking time away from the stuff you're taking for granted.
Rediscover simple pleasures

It can often be the everyday things that bring us the most joy. By discovering the power of mindfulness, we can reconnect with simple, everyday pleasures. Barney Dunn on our PsychCrunch podcast dives into the subject of mindfulness. Check out all of our podcast episodes for more practical life advice here.
Instead of wrestling with anxiety, accept it

The feeling of anxiety is a necessary sensation that humans need for survival, however, when it gets in the way of our enjoyment of life, it can be useful to seek help. Dr Kirren Schnack, Clinical Psychologist and author of Ten Times Calmer: Beat Anxiety and Change Your Life, says there are some practical exercises we can all apply to help reduce anxiety. One of these is 'acceptance', which involves acknowledging and allowing uncomfortable thoughts, feelings, and physical sensations to exist without attempting to control or eliminate them. As Dr Schnack explains; 'Acceptance also demonstrates that when we embrace these inner experiences, their distressing impact gradually fades'.
Write a 'To-Don't' list

Time and what we do with the hours we have can be a constant challenge for many of us. Organisational Psychologist, Dr Amantha Imber, suggests we focus on what we don't want to spend time on rather than a never-ending To Do list. She suggests that we; 'Create a list of things you will not do the following month. Keep this list in eyesight of your desk to act as a constant reminder. In subsequent months, review how it felt to stick to your to-don't list, what served you and what didn't'. Using these observations to remove activities or items from your schedule will free you up to do the stuff that does feel beneficial.
Keep a dream diary

Want to boost your creativity? Keep a notepad by your bed, or even record your memories of the previous night's dream on your phone. Researchers in Colombia discovered that greater dream recall is correlated with measures of creativity and even by simply logging what you can remember, even if that's not everything, could help with imaginative tasks.
Volunteer to enhance your happiness

Several psychological studies have demonstrated the benefits of volunteering for wellbeing, but did you know that offering your time to help others has also been related to improved cognitive and social functioning and lower mortality risk? Employees who volunteer in their workplace were also found to have an enhanced sense of belonging and accomplishment, which in turn, benefits both the employee and employer. However, as chartered psychologist Dr Nishat Babu stresses, organisations and employers should ensure they support these findings by offering shorter working days, flexible work schedules, and a quota of volunteering days.
Turn your why into how

Clinical Psychologist, Dr Jennifer Wild, studied the behaviours of people who thrive despite past traumas or tragic circumstances. She believes we can all take some lessons from these people. One exercise she suggests is to spot when your thoughts have turned to 'Why?' and 'What if?' and instead of spending energy trying to answer unanswerable questions, ask yourself 'How can I feel better now?' and 'How can I refocus on the task at hand?' Chewing over the past or solving unrealised hiccups in the future fuels over-thinking, which delays decision-making and taking action.

SOURCE:

https://www.bps.org.uk/psychologist/19-ways-improve-your-life(accessed 5.8.24)

Influential descriptions of depression are often misleading

Recent work finds widespread misleading descriptions of depression on authoritative mental health websites.

25 July 2024

By Emily Reynolds


Recent work from Jani Kajanoja and Jussi Valtonen has highlighted the surprising prevalence of misleading information about depression on authoritative mental health websites. These descriptions, which often allude to depression as a cause of low mood, are at odds with the descriptive nature of this diagnosis, and could lead those who suffer it to misunderstand the reasons of their symptoms.

Diagnosing depression is done on the basis of symptoms, rather than underlying causes, as might be done for non-psychiatric diagnoses. For example, one can have a tumour, which causes a cough, fatigue, or weight loss. Yet you can both have these symptoms without having a tumour, or have a tumour and experience neither of them. A diagnosis of depression, on the other hand, is made precisely by its symptoms; as Kajanoja and Valtonen write in their new paper published in Psychopathology, one cannot be diagnosed with depression if they do not experience the symptom of depressed mood.

Despite this, descriptions of depression often imply or explicitly state that depression causes low mood and other symptoms, rather than describes them. In this new paper, the Finnish team set out to understand how widespread this issue is online.

Using the search terms "depression", "what is depression", "clinical depression", and "major depressive disorder", they collected the first 30 search results from medical professional, governmental, academic, and charity sector organisations offering information on mental health.

The descriptions these searches identified were then sorted into three categories: "causally explanatory" descriptions, in which depression was presented as causing symptoms (eg. "depression causes feelings of low mood"); "descriptive" descriptions, which presented depression as a cluster of symptoms with no named cause ("depression describes a pattern of symptoms including low mood and loss of pleasure"); and unclear usages, where the causal relationship was left unclear or unstated or a mix of language was used ("people with depression experience a low mood").

Most of the institutions analysed in the study (53%) explicitly described depression as causally explanatory, or used language that was both descriptive and causal. Sites using such descriptions included those managed by some of the most authoritative mental health organisations in the world, such as the World Health Organization, American Psychiatric Association, the National Institute of Mental Health, and the NHS. The remaining pages (46%) used unspecific language that was neither causal nor descriptive.

While differences here may seem purely semantic, the team argues that the understanding of depression conveyed on many sites is often "based on circular logic," which could leave those aiming to understand their low mood worse off. They reference recent research that found that emotional regulation is more successful when people were aware of the causes of their suffering – if educational material bills depression as causative, however, some of those with the condition may not look further to identify potentially-addressable causative factors.

That said, one limitation of the study is that it did not explore whether this concern plays out in everyday life. It remains unclear how significant such differences in language really are in impressing the true nature of depression on those who suffer from it. To mitigate this risk, however, the authors suggest that "information offered by mental health authorities should clearly state that psychiatric diagnoses are purely descriptive, and primarily intended as administrative and bureaucratic tools."

Read the paper in full:

Kajanoja, J., & Valtonen, J. (2024). A Descriptive Diagnosis or a Causal Explanation? Accuracy of Depictions of Depression on Authoritative Health Organization Websites. Psychopathology, 1–10. https://doi.org/10.1159/000538458

SOURCE:

https://www.bps.org.uk/research-digest/influential-descriptions-depression-are-often-misleading(accessed 1.8.24)